"Tell me why, Mummy" by David Thomas

I devoured this book in three days, on two bus trips and two sit-down sessions. Every moment spent reading was like a space in time watching a silent movie. You didn't need the conversation to tell you what was hurting and terrifying. All you needed was your heart to feel what everyone can feel.

Not delving into the everlasting debate of Nature vs Nurture, but Thomas quickly concluded himself to be an unconfident introvert in the beginning of the book. His 'nature' attributed to the allowing of events that later he realised was wrong and perversed. Abused in all aspects, Thomas grew up not knowing parental love. But this didn't stop him from loving and being grateful to his sexually abusive mother at the end of his recollection. Despite his circumstances, Thomas did have a shot at fame and lived a more or less secured life as he grew up. However, he never managed to gain the closure he was seeking in the end which is the reason of titling this book 'Tell Me Why, Mommy?'.

Two things hit me when I finished the novel; one was that we are no different than Thomas. His craving for love and peace and his fear of provoking his parents are what we had and have. True, his situation manifested into a environment of anguish and confusion, but as children, we all felt the pangs of loneliness every once in a while. Two was that, Thomas just told his story simply. He is not the most intelligent person, but in our vernacular, he tugged a chord. It wasn't dramatic nor exaggerated. It was as if he introduced his book this way "Hey, I'm going to tell you about life and I am not looking for sympathy. I'm just throwing out my skeletons and you can have a go at reading it." I guess that's why I loved the book so much.

I hoped I haven't exposed the details of the story. But if you're looking to read about someone's sad life and not want to cry, 'Tell Me Why, Mommy?' is just the dose of melancholy.

The One with the Flashback

Have you ever wondered when that single spark of connection can span a friendship which has lasts for 5 years and counting?

I think this quote is very appropriate for what forms the cornerstone of this blog and what we've been through so far.

"We cannot tell the precise moment when friendship is formed. As in filling a vessel drop by drop, there is at last a drop which makes it run over; so in a series of kindnesses there is at last one which makes the heart run over."
-- Samuel Johnson

I think the times spent in SMSS has been one of the greatest and most precious time which all of us would remember. If I do ever have kids, I probably want them to enrol in St. Margaret's Primary and Secondary. But then again, it's ultimately up to them and the situation in the future.

I've known you girls for a long time, some longer than others. But no matter what, it is the present that matters.

Esther Loke Bao-En! I used to mis-spell your name, writing "Ester" instead of your proper name. Mushroom hair and round glasses. We thought it was mighty cool then! When we were getting promoted to P5, I cried my eyes out because we got posted to different classes. It was like "I lost a part of me" ( I think that's what I wrote in my little journal ). Despite going to different classes and flying off to another continent, I'm glad that we come a long way and still are awesome friends. Brownie, Marble, Caramel, Chubby, Lady :) Summer! Oh I do miss her even though it's a love-hate relationship with Summer.

Remember that time when you told the class that there wasn't Peer Tutoring? Every one was so happy before you said "Oh, that's next week."

Our goal for 2009 : to take decent photos together and make Summer not dislike me.




Sharon Chan Shan-En! You and your crazy antics. You were the new kid in school during Sec 2 and never in my wildest dreams would both of us be friends. Mr Lee and you would always be bickering about something. The tension in the air is so thick, I wonder when it would end. Pro-verbs! Our ever charamstic lead in our dynamic team. All the jamming sessions and laughter, it is something which is so precious that I don't stop thinking of it.

Our goal for 2009 : take decent pictures together. The photos always bring a smile no matter how I'm feeling.



Samantha Khoo Pheng Yan! Who knew that we'll come this far? The small choir girl, smarty pants. The bus 48 rides home. It was such a normal question, like "Who's taking 48!" The wait for the bus was super long, but it didn't seem long because we were having so much fun talking! Until today, we still take buses home! I enjoy all our conversations because it's just the feeling of being so relaxed and exploring of ideas. Funny because even though we're in the same school for 10 years, I'm glad that we found each other after all. America's Next Top Model in the mornings!

Our goal for 2009 : make Dorc more decent so that she can take decent photos with you!



Elena Fung Yuting! Stop being so MIA. Your exams are over already! Hmpf. Who knew that we would be such best friends? I can't stop saying this, but I was like "Who's this girl?" when we were in Sec 2. Haven't seen you BEFORE. It like took me 1 year to realise that you exist in our school. The demure one who has been on this journey of normal student to being "uptight" prefects. You always looking out for girls in coloured bra and then confiscate them! Pervy you who likes to unhook people's bras. I seriously wonder how you and I are such friends because we are completely opposite from each other!

Our goal for 2009 : to take an unglam photo with me!




Louisa Natalie Eng Siew Lyn(n) ! It's amazing because we first met in a foreign land! Our groups were squealing over the guys and it's just so fun and innocent times. Imagine my amazement when we ended up in the same school, let alone in the same class for 2 years! Oh boy, I must have irritated you quite a bit while we were sitting almost next to each other in Sec 4. And Mrs. Raj always asking us to keep quiet. You're always the tennis girl with that extra bounce in her step.

Our goal for 2009 : teach me the Miley Cyrus pout.


Michelle Tan Liting! Fellow Tan and Pro-verbs mate. You were the quiet one. And then you blew me away with your piano skills. I enjoyed doing the musical production in Sec 2. What was your stage name again? I was "Rebecca" and you were ? Please enlighten me on this when you remember. You were always singing in class. I remember that I was once anti Avril Lavigne. You and Jia Hui kept singing "I'm With You" while I tried my best to avoid hearing the song. But guess what. You caught me real good and I fell in love with the song. Talk about first impressions. HAHA! You and the 1/5 gang. And it's so cool because we have brothers of the same age! HAHA! Gosh... there are just too many funny things. You and your NERD club. Oh boy...

Our goal for 2009 : to master GHWT and make Pepper dislike me less.

Here's to more great times ahead! I would like to end off with this quote.


"Even though we've changed and we're all finding our own place in the world, we all know that when the tears fall or smile spreads across our face, we'll come to each other because no matter where this crazy world takes us, nothing will ever change so much to the point where we're not all still friends."

The Girls by Sam

Well, it looks like i'll be the one to start the ball rolling. While i was in the shower just now, i came up with this idea. We can all start off by talking about us, anything at all - memories, tributes, anecdotes, personal thoughts, etc. It will be themed "The Girls", how creative. All good? Wonderful!

Don't you just love ideas that pop up while you're in the shower?

My wonderful girls. Where do i even begin? We've all come so far now, it's been about 5 years since we were in Secondary 3, when we were all thrown haphazardly into this one really random class. Look how we all turned out; those days were most likely the happiest days of our youths for most of us. At least it was for me. Thinking about those 2 years in secondary school made me feel like all that i've been through before that was worth it; all the problems and unhappiness traded for 2 years of fun, bonding and memories. It puts a smile on my face everytime i look back. And my girls, one of the greatest gifts that God could have ever given me. Who would have known that 5 years from then we'd all be standing here like this, stronger, more matured and more worldly-wise.

Thinking about those days always puts a smile on my face and warms my heart. I remember Mich and I were tablemates for the longest time ever, and our favourite pasttime was to sing. How we used to irritate Mrs Chuat! Since we were in choir together, we always just had to find songs that allowed us to "harmonise". How i miss singing in class with you! Do you also recall this once when we laughed for 20 minutes straight during her class all because i spelt out the way she pronounced "vectors" as "vettles"? And she kept going "Tsk, what's going on down there?" and gave us evil stares. I'm laughing as i'm writing this.

Sharon! You never fail to remind me about the time when i was chasing you at the back of the canteen, and you tripped and fell flat on the floor in front of everyone. If i didn't remember wrongly, i was laughing even as i was trying to pick you up. Put the 2 Ss (Asses) together and you get a lot of accidents and stupid antics. Loui was my shopping buddy, and come to think of it, it's been a long time since we went shopping! And remember those days when we would come to class early in the morning and start our early morning ANTM discussion sessions? We were so obssessed. I just have to put this picture up. (Ok i look hideous but what the heck.) Loui's so enthusiastic, Dorc is so bo chap and i couldn't find a proper pose in time. (And Fiona is so act cute as usual.)


And Dorkie! My bus 48 companion! Those bus rides were the highlight of our days many times because of the kind of dumb stuff we encounter on our way home, and the amount of fun we used to had, the 4 of us including Nasarath and Meena. We'll make a din and at that time we were the queens of the bus because very few people took it, since it was a new service. Those days... And it feels like a ritual, or rather like a legacy, because my sister now experiences the same kind of things on bus 48 with her own friends when they go home from school together every day, as we did in the past. Picture again!


And then there was Ele, who's been calling me "Sammie-poo-poo" for the loooooooooongest time ever, though i haven't heard it from you in a while too! Then of course there's Est, who ran away to Australia when we were in Secondary 3. I didn't get to spend enough time with you! At least we had some time in Secondary 2, and i remember being your "Angel" this once during the dumb "Angel-Mortal" game. You suspected me all along because i was sitting right next to you! =( And there's Fiona Chang who sits right behind me and bullies Rina like nobody's business. And how can i forget about the NERD Club and The Chronicles of Boris and Mary! I miss those days!


Looking back, i thank God for giving me this opportunity to meet each one of you and share these memories with. You girls were the highlight of my secondary school life, and the best reasons to go to school for. And today, you girls still remain a great source of comfort to me. We've had our ups and downs, but at the end of the day, we know that nothing can separate us. In times of difficulty, i know i can count on you girls to give me support. In times of joy, i know you girls will be around to celebrate with me. I know that we'll stick around long enough to walk through this journey called "Life" together, hand in hand. We may be on separate continents, but distance will not keep us apart.

So girls, share your stories. I love you all so much.